Slavic Christians are people pleasers

“I would never [pierce my ears], I’m scared to disappoint my parents even though my spouse doesn’t mind.

“I have to stay at my parents' church, or I’ll lose their blessing or relationship"

“What will your husband say when he finds out about…?

“What will people say if I [leave my abusive or unfaithful spouse]

“I’m scared to disappoint my kids by [setting boundaries]—I feel like a bad parent

“My spouse doesn’t obey God, but I have to listen to him, or God will punish me

“I’m scared my pastor will … if I speak up about how I feel…

“We want to move, but are afraid our parents will get mad

“I want to quit my job, but my husband said no…

The examples can go on….

Notice, not once did any of these real examples I’ve heard mention desiring to know God’s perspective.

Not once did they mention how He’ll feel.

Why?

Because we’ve placed man's approval higher than His.

We placed our parents’ and spouses' approval higher than His.

We are so focused on people pleasing that we reject ourselves at a price.

I’m not just referring to external topics like piercing ears—I’m talking deeper.

Topics like safety from an abusive relationship, growing in a deeper relationship with God through grace instead of fear, shame, legalism, and control, etc.

The cost?

Miserable, complacent, and conditioned Slavic Christians living with secret resentment and bitterness because they can’t speak up for themselves, all the while using the false humility card of “I’m obeying the Lord.”

No, you’re not, you’re obeying man and trying to live for him so you wouldn’t get rejected. You fear getting rejected by man more than by God, and as long as that’s the case, man will be who you worship and wonder why your life is miserable. All the while, you’ll reject God because you’re not living according to His Word, which is loving, compassionate, merciful, liberating, etc…think about this.

Your children will either replicate your behavior towards them and your spouse, or they’ll want to be nothing like you. 

They will spend their whole life healing from the patterns they learned from you, by breaking and replacing every one of your destructive behaviors in therapy, or they’ll become an abusive, controlling, lazy, complacent, manipulative, cheating, silent, fearful, depressed, obese, yelling, chronically sick, unemployed, swearing, hitting, and fraudulent “Christian” just like you.

…And then your grandchildren will do the same.

That’s the cost of your every thought, feeling, and action on a grand scale.

How long will our nervous systems, relationship with God, ourselves, and others suffer if we don’t start living like beloved, accepted, seated, and chosen children of the King?

You’re either building the Kingdom of God daily in your home, or you're increasing satan’s kingdom.

Your own kingdom is not an option.