Slavic Christian moms and body image

Dear Slavic Christian mamas, the way that you feel about your body and your identity is going to be a direct reflection of the way that your daughter is going to feel about herself.

If you feel like you’re not good enough and unworthy of love until you perform perfectly at something, then you will place the same expectation upon your child.

If you feel like your body is gross, you will look at your daughter through the same eyes.

If you cannot set boundaries with those around you and allow others to silence or manipulate you into doing what they want, and you don’t, your child will do the same because of your role modeling. 

…I have worked with too many teenagers who struggle with issues that they learned from their mothers. 

No child is born thinking that her body is defective or that there is something wrong with her until that insecurity is planted into her thoughts.

No child is born thinking she’s “dumb, overweight, unworthy of love, a failure, unwanted, etc” until she’s made to feel that way by the people that brought her into this world.

Mamas, if you want your daughter to love herself, not be suicidal, not engage in self-harming behaviors like cutting or starving herself, you must show that you love yourself as the daughter of the King you are.

If you’re wondering, “How can I do so after living this way for so long,” I have a simple solution for you that has changed my life: try putting your eyes on Jesus and celebrating His love for you instead of being a victim to the perceived lack you feel. 

If you’re thinking, “That’s too easy and good to be true,” you’re absolutely correct. God’s love IS too good for sinners like me and you, but because of His Son’s sacrifice, we are now seen as perfect and loved. His blood washed away all our sins, imperfections, failures, insecurities, etc, and replaced it with grace, love, healing, hope, forgiveness, mercy, etc. 

If you’re thinking, “Ilona, this still sounds too far-fetched, can you make it more practical?” I’d like to encourage you to reach out and learn more in therapy. I will teach you every skill you need to know to be set free from your body image insecurities, sense of worthlessness, or imperfection because you’ll learn that your worth doesn’t come from who you are or what you do. It comes from who He is and what He’s done. That’s why focusing on Him instead of your own struggles is so important. He is bigger than your fears, struggles, and shortcomings. He is capable of loving you through all the stages of life that may leave you feeling powerless and alone. He is capable of setting you free from anything that binds you to pain, guilt, and shame- giving you the complete opposite in return: joy, peace, and freedom found only in Him. 

If you’re ready to meet this loving Jesus, please reach out!