Happy 10 years love

10 years ago today, my husband and I said, “I do.”

Ten years ago, we made a covenant that we didn’t fully understand, and with God’s help alone, we have stayed faithful to living it out.

I came into our marriage [unconsciously] traumatized, and God used my spouse to expose every wound and heal them one by one.

10 years ago, I feared men, and he spent the last 3,650 days showing me that he is safe to trust.

I feared having children, and God’s love through him healed me enough to be welcoming our second miracle soon.

His unconditional grace forgave every harsh word and action I hurled at him, hoping to make him run, but it only brought him closer.

He forgave and never held my sins against me.

He is the definition of compassion, love, understanding, grace, mercy, patience, kindness, gentleness, self-control, etc.

I see God’s love in the way He gently leads, generously loves, fearlessly protects, and selflessly provides.

He is someone I hope our sons will imitate and whose character I pray God will replicate in other men, so that girls like me will be blessed to marry.

He is a dangerous gentlemen-courageous and outspoken with his values and beliefs, yet vulnerable and tender when need be. He isn’t a people pleaser but is willing to stand alone if it means standing for Christ. 

It took years of my own therapy and couples counseling to get to where we are today, and for the willingness to persevere, I’m grateful. My therapist saw who we could be instead of the lsit mistakes we presented in sessions and that gave us hope to keep trying instead of giving up, thinking the grass is greener on the other side. 

I pray the Lord uses our storms and victories as a testimony to other couples whose marriages may be on the rocks.

My encouragement is, “Don’t give up. Don’t walk away. Work through every conflict. Seek professional help. Don’t use the “d” word. In every moment, love each other as Jesus did when He gave up His life for you. Heal your past traumas instead of destroying your spouse with it. Forgive, forgive, and forgive again. Rebuild your identity that goes beyond trauma so you can be the healthiest spouse for them and the healthiest parent for your children.”

Dear reader, if you can resonate with our story and want help for your marriage or your own soul, please reach out today.

I’m a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and want to help your marriage heal and thrive like ours has. God turned our hopeless situation into a testament of His miraculous wonder. He is capable of turning every grave into a flourishing garden if we let Him.

My spouse and I are constantly doing the work, and the sparks are still flying-the same is available for yours. There is hope for the bleakest story. With all that said, Happy 10 years, my love. Here’s to a lifetime of loving you more!!